Monday, March 18, 2013

One Year Later

My husband and I have been trying to have a baby. We've been trying for a year. It's kinda strange. All of the women in my family have been very fertile. My mom got pregnant at the drop of a hat. I just assumed it would be the same for me.

Now my monthly cycles bring more than just the usual discomfort. It also brings a hint of sadness. One more month without getting pregnant.

I am trying to figure out what to do. There is a pro-life doctor about an hour away from where I live. Many of the women in my church go to him and he comes highly recommended...but he does not take my insurance. I've been thinking about saving some money and making an appointment to see if there is anything wrong with me.

Tonight, since it marks the one year mark of trying to conceive, I looked up the patron saint of those striving for motherhood. I came across Saint Gerard Majella.

Naturally, women ask Saint Gerard to pray for them in hopes that they will conceive. As I was getting ready to say my first prayer to him, I paused.

I remembered what Christ said about vain repetitious prayer. It's one of those things that many Protestants hold against us, but only because they don't understand. Christ warned against repetitious prayer because it was a tactic the pagans used to conform a god's will towards their own. Instead, we need to turn our will to God's.

What if God does not intend for my hubby and I to have a child? Or what if it takes us 5 years to conceive? Instead of asking that Saint Gerard pray for me to get pregnant, I am going to ask that he prays that I submit myself wholly to God's Will for us.

1 comment:

  1. I feel for you....I did have one child but could not conceive ever again. My only daughter also had problems, she could get pregnant but could not sustain the pregnancy. She miscarried 7 times before she finally gave up. She and her husband were desperate to be parents they decided to adopt. I now have a grandson who is almost 5 yrs old (they got him as a baby) and a granddaughter who is 18 months old (they also got her as an infant). They along with myself could not love these kids more if they were blood. The funny thing is both kids take after my daughter!! Their personalities are much like my daughter's when she was growing up. As my daughter is so fond of saying.....she is raising herself! I will pray for you, I hope you can find peace and joy in your journey to parenthood!